Fairview Road

Lola doesn't know it, but we have left the first house she has lived in, the house we brought her home to, and the place where we were married. Kevin and I view Fairview differently- I saw it as an adventure, a labor of love, and our first joint venture. He considers it a tremendous money pit, potentially a bad investment, and a current financial drain until it sells. Both of us are right to some degree.

So after we got the movers on their way and the cars loaded, we had that final walk through. I don't know how to explain how I felt, because I have said goodbye to so many homes, even one I owned on my very own. But I wasn't exactly sad. But looking at pictures now makes me sad. Even with all of its issues, I loved my little pink house.

"Little pink houses, for you and me..."

Lola moves to Atlanta

It is official, we have moved to Atlanta, and Lola can start her life as the proverbial Georgia Peach. She loves the new house, and her new room is nice and cozy, sans the cute pink walls and chandelier but she has gained a ceiling fan, her new favorite thing! The drive to Atlanta wasn't eventful, Georgia and Lola rode in the car with me and we followed Kevin. We arrived late on Tuesday night tired but it was exciting. We slept on the blowup mattress and the movers were a day late, but we are here. Can't wait for the new adventures.

Goodbyes...

Lola said goodbyes, first to Olivia. That was hard, but didn't feel like a goodbye becase we will see her again. But we will miss her.

Then to friends at lunch, they will be missed, but they will come and go from time to time. Friendships are funny, how they ebb and flow.

And then, to Jordan Center. That was the hardest, because Verna, Tawanna, Wendy, Johnnie Sue, Krystal, Rene, Katherine - all meant so much to us because they not only took good care of Lola, but they adored her, or so it seemed. We felt so comforted knowing she was there. They made a book about Lola's adventures at daycare, and all that she learned and did. Kevin and I were really touched, and we will treasure it. Truly a sad goodbye.

Goodbyes...

Lola said here goodbyes, first at a goodbye lunch with friends, then to Jordan Center. Although she didnt know the difference, Mommy was sad, especially about Jordan Center, because they took such great care of her. On her last day, they gave us a book they had made about Lola at daycare, and all of her adventures. It really touched Kevin and I, and we reflected once again on how great those ladies are, Tawanna, Verna, Wendy, Johnnie Sue, Krystal, Rene, Katherine. We could not have survived the last 6 months without the peace of mind knowing how much they loved Lola.

Milestones!

Lola is officially crawling, as in booking it from one end of the room to the other. Of course, Kevin is surprised about "how much she gets into". Told him...

She can also hold her bottle by herself, which is very convenient when Mommy is trying to do other things.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Lola's 1st Thanksgiving!  Dad, Wendy, & Hallie drove from Arkansas to see us, and it was a haul.  I40 was closed somewhere around Asheville so they had to make a 2 hour detour, making the total drive 16 hours.  And, they had to turn right around and drive back on Saturday.  Wow!

I think Lola proved she was worth the trip :).  She was just starting to really crawl this past week, and talking and babbling a lot as usual.  Also starting to pull up!  We ordered the Thanksgiving meal so we could spend time playing and avoid being tied to the kitchen.  We also ended up driving over to Lake Jordan to visit with Wendy's brother Don who was camping out there.  The only downfall was that Kevin worked his normal hours during the visit, so he was missed.  I am really looking forward to having holidays with him in the future.

Fun things Lola is doing...

Lola-I need to capture all the fun things you are doing, I love the baby book but keeping coming back to the blog-

1.  Crawling, somewhat- Starting to crawl a few inches as of last week while we were in Atlanta.  Mostly up on all fours and crawls a few, then drops onto your.  Lola- are you trying to decide if you would rather walk than crawl... I say that because...

2.  Downward dog position- getting up on all fours with rear in the air, in the yoga "downward dog" position.  I keep waiting for you to just get up and walk!

3.  Talking-  A LOT!  You are babbling out of control, goo goo gaa gaa and then just yelling.  It is so funny, you are going to be a loud mouth like your momma.  All the noises are really funny. 

4.  Very observant- you really intensely watch everything.  When I picked you up from daycare yesterday, you were enamored with the conversation between the teachers and another parent, in fact you moved your head back and forth as if you were following the conversation.  Priceless...

You are so fun, really you are the best thing that every happened to us.  Lola Boo!

Ride to "school"

Stroller ride to daycare this morning. We will miss having our daycare within walking distance of the house...

House in Atlanta

We rented a house in Atlanta, on Los Angeles Ave. Right in the middle of Virginia Highlands. Right in the middle of town, next to Ponce and its influx of "unproductive citizens", right where the taxes are too high, parking space is a premium, and houses are half the size per $ than the average home outside the perimeter. Why? Because living in the burbs just wouldn't be right...

Halloween!

Lola was a butterfly, probably the cutest butterfly ever. I am biased but geez she was cute. She greeted trick or treaters and rolled around on the floor in her costume. Then, she ate a Milk Dude Kevin gave her.

Lola goes to Atlanta...

Lola had a great time in Atlanta- she stayed with cousin Mann and Sandy and was given the royal treatment (thanks Sandy for being a great hostess), went to a pumpkin patch with Jacob Joyner, and had dinner at Felini's. Best part, she got to see Grammy and Grandpa again and see Georgia Tech for the first time, yea! She was an angel on the plane, too...

I told her we would be moving to Atlanta soon, but I am not sure if she understood. Adventures await us!

Life is full of surprises...

Kevin is being offered a job with NetApp in Atlanta... go figure, we go full circle. When I started down this path with Kevin I was living there, but never thought we would venture our way back to Atlanta. Exciting and scary...

Glad I planned a trip there this weekend to meet up with Sima, Rick, Patsy. I will be looking at Atlanta through a different lens, with scrutinizing eyes, and thus a very different viewpoint than my single existence when I lived there before. Should be interesting...

The Jordan Center

It has been 1 month since Lola started daycare at the Jordan Center, and I had no idea how much I would love it. They have been so great to her, she loves it, and I don't worry. Everyday she comes home and is just exhausted, often she just wants to sit in her pink chair and veg out, kind of like me after a day at work.

Thank you Jenni!

So it was our last day with Jenni, and now Lola goes on to day care because her spot is available at the Jordan Center. Jenni was soooooo good to her, and I think we are all surprised how attached everyone got to the arrangement, including Jenni's kids Kate and Brennan. I couldn't have done the past 3 months without her support, motherly advice, and love for my Lola. She really made it so much easier.

Thank you Jenni, Lola luvs you!

Happy Birthday- 35- Ouch!

It was a very good birthday, even though it was 35 and it seems like the magical thirtysomething age is slipping away. Now I have to think about mamograms, amnio for pregnancy, botox? I guess the only difference I can identify is the lack of energy- is that because I am getting farther away from my youth or because I have a baby?

Anyway, it was a great day and weekend. Kevin got flowers and a card, one from him and one from Lola. I never get cards from him, so it was a treat! And a visit from Mom topped it off, it was a GREAT weekend. We had so much fun, and she loved on Lola all weekend. Lola really ate it up, and belly laughed too.

It made being 35 not so bad.

Hallie's visit

Hallie and Todd visited over the weekend, on their way to DC to move Todd in to start law school at GW. Then, Hallie goes back to Little Rock to start grad school at the Clinton School.

Seeing them, thinking back to that age bracket, before Kevin and Lola, seems like another life. I go back to that "other life" sentiment a lot. I have found myself saying a lot lately, "oh that was in another life"

When will now become another life?

Good luck Hallie and Todd - the world is yours for the taking... You too, Lola Boo...

Why I like working...

Typical Sunday night- the anticipation and dread of the work week ahead started to percolate. The feeling that I wasn't quit rested and didn't get enough prep done for the week, plus general anxiety of parting with Lola once again prevailed. So welcome week beginning…

Then, a funny thing happened. I got to work, settled in, and the day just started moving along. I had a few meetings, scheduled a few more, and I got some details/people moving to keep planning of my project moving along. I had a few laughs with Dave and others out in cubeland before lunch, and I rounded things out with a Amy's frozen dinner and a quick surf of the Nordstroms site (Anniversary Sale in progress, yesss). I watched a new video of Lola on my iPhone and I missed her, but I didn't feel sad. I bet Jenni is trying to feed her some solid food right about now, and that makes me happy.

So right now, in this moment, work makes me happy. I started the day feeling tired, a little out of control, overburdened. Once I got in the office, in the course of a few hours, I set the direction of the day and week, moved our team a little closer to making decisions, and learned a few new things (about integrated test environments,anyhoo). Today I owned something, I learned something, and I improved something. When the workday is done, I can go get Lola at 5:30 and play a little, have dinner with Kevin, and call it a day.

So for today, it is good. Working Mom is good...

Lola's 4 Month Checkup-

Lola had her 4 month checkup yesterday- she is 16.5 pounds, 24 1/2 inches in length. That translates to the 93% in weight, 48% in height! She is a healthy baby and growing like a weed! I told her she may not be the tallest girl in the class but she would be the prettiest/smartest/sweetest either way.

She also rolled over today, too! So fun watching her rock and roll back and forth on her side and then she gets her entire body rolled over the obstacle - her arm and shoulder. She is also holding toys in her hands and bringing them to her mouth. Next she will roll back the other way and start doing mini pushups. She won't be the same baby in the next two months. Can't wait, but makes me sad. She changes in a blink.

4 Months Old!

Lola was 4 months old on Friday - wow, how time flies. I woke up really early this AM, and for some reason it reminded me of the morning I went into labor and my water broke so early at 4AM. I don't know why that memory jumped into my thoughts...

It is already hard to remember our life before her, it seems so natural to have her in the mix. She is trying to roll over (any day now), can hold a toy in her hand, and is starting solid foods. Kevin swears she belly laughed yesterday, but sadly I missed it. She has become our entertainment, joy, and respite despite the burdens of work and commitments that seem to overshadow us right now.

I ended tonight like I do every night, rocking Lola before bedtime. It is by far the best part of the day. At first she squirms a little, and then she starts to surrender and settle in. And then I hear the quick little paces of her sucking on her pacifier, and my heart aches. It aches with overwhelming love for her, and excitement for how she is evolving. It aches because she will get too big too fast, I won't be able to protect her forever, and eventually she won't need me anymore. But for now, she and I know that 10 minutes each night is a magical, mesmerizing time where we just rock and love. And then I put her in her crib and say the same thing every night, "Sweet dreams Lola Grace" I wonder if she dreams yet?

July 4th and Old Friends!

Rick and Patsy came for a quick visit for July 4th and Lola! It was fun, and it was perfect timing because Lola just started baby talking and trying to roll over. We are really starting to see her develop and change, sad to see the tiny newborn slip away but excited for things to come.

We also enjoyed reconnecting with old friends, as in Patsy's friend Felice Gavin. Two years ago Patsy called and told Kevin an old friend and playmate from 2nd grade in Houston was living in Raleigh. It turns out Barbara and her husband Matt were our neighbors, literally. Wow, small world. We have enjoyed getting to know them and hanging out. But the best part was seeing Patsy and Barbara's mom Felice reconnect after all these years. They have kept in touch with the occasional email and holiday card, but these was a real chance to catch up. The best test of friendship that has been divergent because of geography, life, whatever is meeting up again and just picking up where you left off. I always say old friends are good for the soul.

So my hope for Lola is that she can learn the value of friendship and to be a great girlfriend herself. Some friendships will come and go, some will last forever. It will be one of the most valuable life lessons she will learn.

Make new friends, but keep the old...

Back to work...

I am back to work after 3 months maternity leave -this is my third week back. If I had written the first week, the tone would have been ok, happy to be be back and enjoying a change of pace. Missed Lola, but doable. Second week, not so much. I guess it set in how much I miss her, how tired you are at the end of the day, and how little time I get with her during the week. Monday and Tuesday are good, Kevin keeps her on Monday, she goes to the nanny on Tues but he is still there during the day, and we usually meet for lunch. By Tuesday night it gets stressful, he is gearing up to go into the office at 10PM and will do that through Friday night. So Wed-Friday mornings and evenings I am on my own.

It is doable, and many families have far more stressful lives. But this is not how I pictured it would. We need a change to happen so life can be normal again, we can wake up together and go to sleep together, that would be nice. Thank goodness for a happy, sweet baby. It's as if she knows we have these obstacles, and she wants to be a good girl and not any trouble for Mommy and Daddy. She is so sweet, I told her last night when she fussed "It's ok to cry." Why is this baby so good? I don't deserve her…

So I know it goes from easy to harder and easy again. Working moms probably stay on this rollar coaster of emotions

Family Ties and Happy Father's Day

I think Kevin had a great first Father's Day. We went to Lake Keowee to meet up with BJ/Allison/Matthew/Katherine/Lily while they were visiting Rick and Leslie at their lake house. So much fun. I had seen the kids in Janurary so they hadn't changed much, but was so surprised to see how grown up Rick and Leslie's two girls were (Caroline and Emily). I take more notice of girls since Lola, and we had a house full of them- Matthew is the lone boy of the group, but he handles it well.

The entire weekend was great, and the right thing at the right time. Aside from being great hosts and having a fabulous house and lake set up, they are just a very tight knit, great family. When you consider the textbook way to raise a family and enjoy your kids, this is it. Their situation has evolved because you have two sisters who are best friends, and husbands who have been in the mix for a long time- BJ and Allison had a wedding anniversary that weekend too, how about 18 years! Jeez… so they have been family and entertwined for longer than they have not. Even though I have siblings- BJ/Mandy/Hallie, we are all worlds apart for many reasons- age, geography, station in life -and Kevin is an only child. So we left the weekend mentally processing our family unit and how it will evolve now that we have Lola. In a brief conversation during the weekend, BJ told me "Kevin and Lola are really your family now" and I undersand what he meant. I understand a lot more now since this baby- in fact, I think I have had more clarity in the last four months than I have had in most of my adult life. But ironically, I am a bundle of mixed emotions about life, the future, the past. How is that?

I think Kevin walked away seeing two guys, who are not so much unlike him, professional and career focused, but at the end of the day they are defined by their role as father. I think that is the case with Rick and BJ, and I suspect it will be the case with Kevin. Maybe he has found his calling?

Happy Father's Day Kevin...

Lola Boo

So I am officially in love with Lola, affectionaly nicknamed Lola Boo. I have to confess, this love was not immediate- in fact, the last two months have been consumed with my need to adjust and absorb her, understand her and know I can do this and she is ok. Those fears interrupted the expected overwhelming feelings of love, which were there, but not consuming. That has changed, and now when I look at her I feel it in my bones.

I could list the dozens of things that are so amazing about her- her little chirps, the smile I am seeing so often now, how much fun it is to rock her every night before bedtime. How everyone seems so drawn to her when we are out and about. She is so special, beautiful, and consistent. Her temperament is perfect, she complains very little and just seems happy to be alive and loved by Mommy and Daddy. Could I have asked for a better baby?

Who knew how much fun she would be, and how much Kevin and I would love her so much? All the parents of the world were right, you just don't understand until you are in it.

Everyone needs an Aunt Lola

I got the most beautiful crocheted baby blanket from my Aunt Donna, for whom I am named. It is pink with a green border and just adorable. It will be cherished as much as the other pink crocheted bedspread she gave me, originally made fo my Grandma but passed on to me by Aunt Donna shortly before Grandma's death. Both are cherished...

So my Aunt Donna and my Aunt Jana have been especially wonderful to me throughout my life. I spent many summers with Aunt Jana and she still remembers my birthday and sends cards for Valentine's Day and Easter. Always so thoughtful...

Aunt Lola had the same meaning for Patsy, so when she reminised about her so often and with such fondness, I remember thinking how much I loved the stories, and the name. Hence Lola Grace was chosen, Grace for Grace Wynn, another beloved aunt. My friend Olivia has her Aunt Mandy, and I am sure I know lots of girls who had thier favorite Aunt. Grandmother's are special and revered, too, but maybe there is something different about an Aunt, more like a sister, I don't know. A great Aunt is just special, fun.

Daddy's girl

I have been replaced by another woman :) Kevin said he wanted a girl first, and I don't think he could be crazier over this baby. For someone who had little or no experience with babies, he is a natural. Feeding, diaper changes, playing- you name it he does it without any hesitation.

Funny story- he kept her while I was at a Jr. League meeting, and they took a trip out for dinner (ambitious for a 1st time Dad!). Apparently Lola wouldn't keep her pacifer in her mouth and he dipped it in sugar and gave it to her. When he texted me that night I thought he was joking and laughed with my friends at the meeting. Turns out he was serious...

It's a small world...

Another cool thing about the Nashville trip, we randomly ran into Bruce/Jen/Derek/Casey/Marnie/Todd- Jenks crew in the Nashville airport! They are all high school friends of Kevin's and I know them from attending Bruce and Jen's wedding last September. They were going to a wedding, guy from Jenks but can't remember his name. I was at the baggage claim and there was Derek and Casey just standing there, it was too funny. We just couldn't believe it! Small world

Nashville with Grandpa, Grandma and Aunt Hallie

So we flew to Nashville for Hallie's graduation from Vanderbilt, and a first visit with Dad and Wendy. Lola was an angel- not a peep on the plane either way. But when we got there she wailed from being hungry, so that was Wendy's first encounter with her.

So her first plane trip, hotel stay, and college graduation. I told her to pay attention at the Vandy ceremony because we exptected great things from her.

Grandpa and Grammy!

Kevin's parents came to vist, Grandpa and Grammy. They were so patient to wait almost 4 weeks to see Lola, their 1st Grandchild! They were so proud and eaten up with her, naturally! I can't wait to see how this love affair evolves.

It was a fun week. It was over the Easter holiday, we hung out, went to some antique shops, and mostly just oodled over Lola. She is the best...

Lola's newborn photo shoot

I had Amanda Olson come over and do a newborn photo shoot at 10 days old, it was great! Lola was great and Amanda is fantastic... plan to do several more this year, maybe a 6 month and 1 year old? We will see, can't get enough pics of my little superstar :)

Everybody loves Lola!

So many people have visited Lola in the first few weeks, it has been so amazing to have so many show the love. Even in the hospital, Joel/Allisa/Robyn/Franklin/Olivia all made an appearance. Mac/Kim/Kissy came by over the weekend. I love all the love...

Grand comes and goes...

Mom arrived the day after Lola was born and left today :(- I know she would like to have been here for the birth as she was for all 5 grandchildren so far, but she missed it by a day. She was a proud Grandmama and said Lola was extra special because she is the baby of her baby. Funny...

So somehow we survived the 1st week. Much harder than I thought- this little one is not interested in breast feeding- I had no idea how hard it would be even though I was warned. I am hooked up to the breast pump trying to feed her as much as possible with breast milk, but she has to have formula too. I guess the first thing we are learning about baby is that things don't always go according to plans.

Lola Grace

She is here... March 17, 2009, 12:25 AM. The labor and delivery was nothing like I expected. She is nothing like I expected. Much better, more beautiful, smaller. A head full of hair! So many details, so tiny, so large. Kevin was great, he was super Doula, and I couldn't have done it without him. Much more to come...

Sprinkles and Showers!

We are very fortunate because we have had many people shower us with kindness and gifts! Three showers, a "sprinkle" from my Jr. League group, they got our swing from our registry which was an awesome gift! Also an adorable pink and green bib. Also a work shower, Myra and Dave hosted and it was fun. Probably 20 people came which was unexpected and they really showered us with great things, so kind. Kevin came to that one which was fun, and we played all the silly games you play at showers. Also, people wrote advice on cards which I liked and found to be useful. I will put that in Lola's baby book...

Last fabulous shower was given by Olivia and Robyn, it was at Robyn's house and a lot of fun. I was especially grateful because Leslie and Nicole came and they both had two week old babies! Jen came too, so lots of new moms there. That was especially fun.

Nursery!

We had planned on the baby's gender being a surprise, but a third trimester ultra sound to check for Placenta Previa (turned out to be no problem) provided us with a Christmas surprise- learning the gender! When we went to the ultrasound I asked Kevin if he wanted to know the sex and he said most definitely- I could tell how important it was to him.

So much for my gender neutral nursery! We had already decided on a white crib and contemplated a French blue and white color scheme, but now it is PINK, PINK, PINK! Hate to be cliche, but I just couldn't resist. I had the bedding made, a hassle and in hind site I would purchase it. But I wanted to do it just this once because future babies wont afford the time to tend to such details.

So pink and green it is... I can't wait for her to get here!